Monday, March 12, 2007

我很自我为中心。。。太过了。

认识我的人都应该知道在教会打鼓是我的大挑战。
每次都需有许多的预备,很多时候,预备在多也打不好。
常常内疚浪费别人的时间,拖累整个敬拜队伍。
这种感受就是有恩赐的人不会明白的。
但我还使很庆幸大家这样通融我的不足,这样的鼓励我。

4月22日是教会的诗歌见证会,是特别节目。
我被邀请作见证。。。
虽然很紧张又害怕,但认为自己也应该在众人面前荣耀神吧!
所以就答应了。
(已有见证的“骨头”了哦!)

但是,前几天知道自己也在当天参与领唱,我吓坏了。
真的。
虽然平时我很多话,很多意见,但是一定看不出我也很胆小吧?
我正是胆小鬼。
至少,我的自我不应许我把面子放下,在台上出丑。

所以,说是自卑,骄傲,自我都好。。。
饶了我吧!
我可以答应大家我会朝着这个目标前进的。
但是目前,虽然心灵愿意,肉体却软弱。
这种感受,你明白多少?

5 Comments:

At March 12, 2007 1:29 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, we as worship team mates are one for all and all for one. DON'T think that you are dragging us down. Cos personally i have see that you put in your very the best in every rehearsals and sun services. And can see that you are improving and you will be better with more practises :)

As for the ZL, who never have the first time. Hmmm...... for your query we shall think about it again. Yeah!!!!

 
At March 12, 2007 9:43 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

read ur post ytd,tot of it,n heres my say.i tink u noe wat GOD requires of u.e qns is will u do it?u understand tt ur luv4self is coz'n e struggle u'r hav'n.so nw wat u mus decide is:a)allow pride2keep u fr do'n wat GOD intends u2try in HIS mercy,b)jus do it humbly noe'n HE'l lead,nt u.u'r so careful abt pass'n tots which bob in2ur mind n out again,worry'n abt so many details tt u shld nt b tink'n abt.y r u nt as careful abt ur continued resistance to e Holy Spirit and e need of church?is dis continued resistance due2e fact tt HE has nt given u wat u wan in a way tt flatter ur ego?wat else cn a begger who recs bread do mr himself?it's GOD who has been work'n,dun u noe?isnt humility an instrument of GOD which makes us hav faith in HIM rather dan ourselves?isnt dis e way u die2self within?cn u expect GOD2minister2ur selfish pride?didnt we agreed tt where HE leads,HE provides?didnt u say u cn die4Charis?where r all dese passion n luv?believe u'l regret post'n dis post in time2come,but if u dun take e chance HE prepares4u,,,u'l regret mr.wait'n4u2share w me how GOD worked thru u after22/4/07.u cant,tt y HE pickd u,no?

 
At March 13, 2007 8:18 PM, Blogger CL said...

WL: Hmm, it's my struggle and my problem I've got to face and learn. Thank you for always being so patient and understanding towards my selfishness...

WM: I love Charis to my death. And to death I’ll rise with her. This hasn’t changed. It may be neglected, hidden, messed up in a pile of selfishness, blurred... But I am more than clear, it didn’t once leave my small heart. Thank you for this hurting comment, yet so beneficial. Forget abt apologising, it may lose your charm! Haha...

 
At March 13, 2007 9:10 PM, Blogger Unknown said...

Lol y suddenly i in the picture sia and i dun even know anything =.='

 
At March 13, 2007 9:52 PM, Blogger Grace said...

cheng long!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

have u gotten a new line?
call us k?

we r meeting up for dinner
miss miss u u

 

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