Thursday, June 01, 2006

"WOW" Day

There're somethings in life that you'll never find it back after you missED it. And the most common one is TIME. Once you pass your childhood, you have no return. Once you pass your youth period, you never get it back. After your schooling years, you just lose it. It's just not the same anymore. There're somethings that you've done can never be repaired. The damage is there. You may say. "God heals." Indeed He heals, but there'll still be scars of memories. Imagine one day you meet a magic doctor who can heal all cut wounds and leave no scars. He has this cream which serves an instant effect, leaving no marks on your wounds. You were glad you met Him. However, will you keep cutting yourself, thinking you have the doctor's cream? You'll say I'm nuts, but wait. Don't we do it all the time?

Aiya, don't read Bible today la, I can read tomorrow. I'll watch pornography first and ask for forgiveness later, it's too tempting. I'll laze more now and take a cab later. I tell a lie to get through then I'll do my devotion later. I'll play two more games now and so my work tomorrow... Isn't all these familiar? We choose to cut oursleves, even when we know that those cuts hurt.

I've came to realised that every little efforts we made to want to draw near to the real God, He spents more time helping us to get closer to Him, if not He comes closer to us Himself! Today, I learnt "meditation" in a more practical and solid way. To meditate is to focus on something. When you walk, you think about it. When you sit you think about it. When you work you think about it as and when you don't need too much energy. When you play or relax, you think about it. I meditated Romans 12:1-2. Mind you, for the 2 whole days just these two verses. Nothing more. I memorised them with great effort.(Maybe some may take just 5mins to do it...) In my meditation, I not only memorise, I tasted it. I ask myself questions. I wanted to act like Jesus, I tried to think like him. I asked myself what would he care about most if he was me, in my position. How would Jesus give His body as He goes to school? And I fasted today.

No gastric, thank God for the mercy He has for me.(I was pretty worried actually~) I asked God to give me vision, to see what He'll see if He was walking along that shelter, if He prepares to go for work, if He has to reject earthly things, if He sees that irritating guy, if He hears people starting to gossip, if He walks home from work... I asked for chances for me to do something, as I see with God-tacles. Guess what?! I did! I gave the cardborad grandma all that I have with me, $4.20. She thanked me as if I spared her a life. And in on the way back, I couldn't control my tears. So I pretended to take out Reader's Digest to read. To cover my silly tears. I asked for God-tacles, He gave. I asked for chance to do good, He gave. I asked for gastric-free fast, He gave! And to me, He gave more than these. He added Joy(I never ask), Peace(I never ask), Love(I never ask) in my tiny heart...

You may think that I'm very weird and out of mind. I can't control but to urge that you try the same. To tell God what you want to do for Him in your morning bath, to choose a verse to memorise on your way to work, to see life through God-tacles~ Until you tried that, you'll never understand me and not understand how our Lord works. Don't sleep in MRT, try bringing a book? Don't leave home without a prayer. Don't allow yourself to serve meat that meal if you've forgotten to pray. Don't read RW's book before reading Bible. Don't switch on the TV before doing all that you should. A focused life=Listing down all that we have to do and all that we vow NOT TO DO.(RW said that~) Then can we be focused. Cut down on some things which don't matter that much until God gives me one more hand to handle.(I seriously don't want~)

When you think of what God has done for you, is that too much to ask? We're to give ourselves up, because that's the kind of sacrifice Lord wants, living and Holy. Com'on, transform me, brainwash me, change me. I want to think like You. See like You. Hear like You. Speak like You. Act like You. I want to be like Your shadow. Don't put out my fire by asking me when will I ever reach THERE. That's not what I'd like to focus.

Step by step, each a step of faith. Weak and fragile faith walking, careful!

1 Comments:

At June 01, 2006 10:57 PM, Blogger CL said...

Now when I re-read my post, I kind of felt mushy...

Nevertheless, proud of my God!

:D

 

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