责任

为何人就是这么浮浅，这么善变？
难道就只是这么轻浮吗？
真失望噢。

我就是我

镜中的我是与我如此相反，
又是如此相识。。。

Pretender.

为什么每次我都是被埋在谷里？
被欺骗的感觉还真是。。。不爽的咯。
骗了人你很高兴吧？


我下次不这么傻了。



不，不，不。。。

休想有下一次，门都没有！
再被你耍，我就真的要变成世界大白痴了。

Have to be Thankful.

Well, I overslept today. Hmmm, but I like myself being involve in meaningful activities till late night. I mean, I like my life to be used in these than the other stuff that don't last eternity. Not wasted in those which ruin as the wind comes or as time passes... You knwo that nothing can fill the void in all of us unless they are things which helps to fulfill your purpose you are breathing this instance. Still, I know I shouldn't oversleep. I do better next time k. ;)

I read from a booklet stating so many things to remmeber, so many things to forget in life. Forgetting things which makes us sad, remembering things which makes us glad. Forgetting friends who hurt us, remember those who stuck by us. Forgetting troubles that have passed, remembering blessings we enjoyed... Haven't you realise that we cannot choose what to remember and what to forget?!

You cannot remember to forget something, you will only end up remembering it better. Don't believe, GO TRY. The best way to really forget is to not focus on it. AND then focus on the other things to replace the memory space. But then, if you cannot not focus on something which really bugs you, congrates! You should actually face it.

Although I have so much to share, but I still stuck with some of life's little edges to breakthrough. In our meeting yesterday, something that was said struck me. "A healthy person give thanks." Well, not that I do not know a healthy person give thanks but it didn't occur to me that by giving thanks, I can grow healthier. So, shouldn't I be thankful? Although I feel like slapping myself for being so dumb for so long, looking forward to something which is doesn't even exist... But still, I want to give thanks!

Thankful that I do not have everything I desire.
If I do, what's there to look forward to?

Thankful for my limitations.
That would mean that I have opportunities to learn.

Thankful for the difficult times.
During those times I grow most.

Thankful for all challenges along the way.
Because they will build my strength and character!

Thankful for the mistakes made.
They taught me valuable lessons.

Thankful for feeling tired and weary.
It just means I have made effort in life.

Thankful for all the setbacks I've met.
Because a fulfilling life comes to those who at least tried but failed.

Thank You for the love and grace You displayed upon the Cross with Nails.
As long as I'm still alive, I want to spend my whole life fulfilling the purpose in me.

Life need not be wealthy. If you think in-dept, you know it need not be healthy as well. I have learnt not to ask for understanding and justice. Life is not about pleasing or explaining ourselves to people. So let's give up trying to serve two God. Because we only have a heart each...

It's beyond self...

People, my internet is down again... Sounds pathetic huh. But the truth is even if it wasn't down, I'm still too tired to blog. Everyday is a battle between Zzz-body&mind and studies+projects. It's so tiring to juggle school and the activities I have well. I mean, there bound to have edges I have to choose, some sacrifices I have got to make. But, I must say, life is definately more worth living like this. At least I know, I worth the hours I breathe!

Well, there are plenty of thoughts going through my head each day. So many that I can't keep track. However, there are the few which affects me greatly. One of it is definately my cg.

Although I only meet on weekends but my my heart is drawn to them whenever I'm walking alone. Although we seldom talk on the phone, but my mind pops images of them whenever I lay on my bed. Thinking of what wonderful servants God is going to mould them into. Thinking of what kind of parents they will be. Thinking of how I can help them make it through the army without disgracing Him. Thinking of their school life, their church life, their family life. I also think about how we're going to step ahead as we matures as a whole.

They are the ones who motivate me to set a good example many a times. They remind me of the importance of never going off-track ANY MOMENT. They remind me that I can never say, 'Wait, I'll be right back. Use me later.' to God. I can never leave my devotions because that would mean that I wouldn't be able to share concepts, facts, my analysis with them. They help me draw nearer to God always. Most importantly, they remind me that they are the future of Charis. That's why I take pride in leading this cg. Because I know, we are the mould of what Charis will turn out to be in the next 15-20yrs or so.

I never dare to laugh at their dreams of becoming youth workers, church pastors, worship leaders... Because those who laughed at Noah build the ark were drowned. I never dare to doscourage them by saying, 'You're too young to set an example to them.' because the Bible says otherwise. I never wish to stop their wild and creative(at times very inpractical) ideas in serving, because it's of good intentions. Didn't the Lord says that it's the heart that matters in the end?

0203, we don't have to stayover every weekends or call each other everyday to build our relationship. We don't have to be in the same cg to maintain our friendship. The love that was built around us is strong enough to hurt and anger me whenever you are sliding off the path. The more we love the good things, the more we should hate the bad.

There are so many people taking 'leave' from the work of God in this generation, each being busy of their own interests, their own sinful desires and their own ambitions. Have the purpose He planned in us being able to fulfilled? Or are we so self-centred that we can't see any other meaningful areas we should invest our time and effort in other than our own concern and attractions? It's time, time to release the power of God that's within us.

Eph4:12. Do all that you're given well. Not just because your Charis needs, but also because we need to be trained and moulded and disciplined... In order to be used. Face your challenges today for a better tomorrow!